Solo Travel?

Do you like to go solo?

Recently I had my first two tastes of traveling alone. I noticed a number of interesting differences in the experience, and found myself analyzing them. I also began soliciting comments from some veterans who have a good basis for comparison.

Traveling solo presents an excellent opportunity for adventure on one’s own terms. You can come and go as you wish, without negotiations. When one’s schedule is her own, everything from bedtimes to meals and departure dates become imbued with flexibility and spontaneity. An extra day here or a day excursion there? No problem. If you want to tarry at an outdoor market or just enjoy your hotel for an afternoon, no need to explain or affect someone else’s plans. My friend Jessie says:

“You can do what you want when you want to. There’s no feeling bad ‘cause you slept all morning, or because you’re desperate to see an art exhibit that you know your travel partner has no interest in seeing.”

The power to satisfy your own agenda in real time is HUGE, and not to be underestimated. Freedom is the greatest adventure. One voice of experience says: “The best moves I made were the last minute ones.”

But beyond freedom and spontaneity as Master of Your Own Logistics, there is something even more compelling. Many people find that solo travel is a richer, more intense experience. Why is that?

Well, owning your itinerary and controlling your travel destiny to some extent is empowering, no doubt.

And let’s be honest here. Some travel partners --- even (especially?) friends and lovers --- can be needy and demanding. Travel with people you know can keep you psychologically confined to the social world and connections you share. On the other hand, traveling solo means that the only baggage that comes along on your trip is your luggage.

Finally, solo travel requires a continuity of sustained attention to one’s surroundings. Circumstances require that you be both observant and present because so much --- your transport, your safety, your food ---depends on it. One of the side benefits of that kind of attention is the ability to notice detail and nuance. Being there “in the moment” translates into a very vivid, conscious travel experience (as any vipassana meditation yogi will tell you).

To be sure, single travelers are more approachable, and obviously this can be a mixed blessing:

“I visited The Red Fort in Delhi in 1993. Everyone there wants to be your tour guide. I happened to meet a local guy, a student from Calcutta who had never been to the Fort, and also wanted to visit Gandhi’s grave, like I did. So we decided to do some sight-seeing together. When the would-be tour guides set upon me, I smiled and told them ‘My guide is my new friend Ahmet.’ The local guys started beating my new friend up! I had to intervene to stop them! But Ahmet and I ended up having a great day.”

This leads us to the biggest cause for concern in going it alone: security. And for women especially, this can be a challenge, even a deal-breaker. Overly aggressive men in Bordeaux, ass-grabbing in the Marrakesh medina, and crowded bemo rides with overly-friendly strangers in Java can put a real damper on one’s trip. Theft and rip-offs are perhaps easier to work against a single person.

Still, with a modicum of caution and an ounce of prevention, solo travel can be extremely rewarding. Here are some suggestions to those who would “go it alone:”

1. Be sensible in your dress and appearance. You’ve heard these words of travel wisdom a million times: no expensive-looking jewelry or watches, keep money and cameras hidden, don’t “flash your cash.” And don’t show a lot of skin; it’s provocative and often seen as disrespectful.

2. Share your itinerary or contact info with a few friends or relatives, even on the fly. If you’re staying in a guest house or hotel, let them know when you can be expected, and provide a cell number.

3. A phrase book or google translate is always helpful. Learn how to say “Please leave me alone or I’ll call the police” in the local language, or write it down in block letters and keep it handy. Also keep a card with your local address and phone.

4. Don’t carry a lot with you. Pack as light as possible (here is an old post on this subject: http://monterisiinmondoindo.blogspot.com/2012/12/packing-smart-and-simple.html )

Keep your arms free when possible.

5. Wear a whistle around your neck. I often carry a pocket knife or industrial razor blade with me, and I like those small traveler’s lights sold at camping stores.

6. Stay away from unlighted, unpopulated areas.

These are precautions worth taking, of course, but I hope you will not be deterred from going it alone. It’s a wonderful experience, and you will remember it, I promise. 

A Middle Road? Finally, I have a suggestion for those who would like to try solo travel even though they are with a friend or group: spend a day on your own. My nephew and I did this on our last day in Paris. I wanted to visit the old Les Halles and a nearby cafe, and he wanted to go somewhere I had no interest in. We split after breakfast and met back at the hotel later in the evening. It was a great day for both of us, and we had plenty to talk about when we re-convened. Try it!

Do you have any comments on this subject? I would enjoy seeing them.